


More than Jealousy

by WritingCreatingStorytelling



Category: Chris Evans - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Insecurities, Jealousy, jealous!chris
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-31
Updated: 2015-10-31
Packaged: 2018-04-29 05:43:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5117636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingCreatingStorytelling/pseuds/WritingCreatingStorytelling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>jealous!chris</p>
<p>-----<br/>His knuckles were ghostly white, his jaw set, housing the clenching of his teeth. The fury was there in his stormy eyes and furrowed brows that were pointed towards the road ahead, his entire stiff demeanor exhibiting the turbulence of the dark thoughts that were dominating any rational part of his brain that wanted to scream at him to get his shit together.</p>
<p>Natalia had never seen him so angry before.</p>
            </blockquote>





	More than Jealousy

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to the two lovely readers on Tumblr that requested a jealous!chris oneshot. Thanks for reading!! xx

His knuckles were ghostly white, his jaw set, housing the clenching of his teeth. The fury was there in his stormy eyes and furrowed brows that were pointed towards the road ahead, his entire stiff demeanor exhibiting the turbulence of the dark thoughts that were dominating any rational part of his brain that wanted to scream at him to get his shit together.

Natalia had never seen him so angry before.

The tense atmosphere in the cabin of the truck could be cut with a thick knife as the tires rolled down Route 24 North towards Boston, twenty miles over the speed limit.

Chris had yet to utter a single word for the past twenty minutes. Actually, he had yet to acknowledge her ever since announcing his eagerness to skip out of the party early. And that had only been because she had asked when she saw his sour mood, unaware it was directed at her.

But now that they were on the road, in complete deafening silence, she knew _she_ was in trouble. For what, who knew?

“Can you please slow down?”

Chris’s fingers curled around the steering wheel tighter. “Why-,” he spit out, “-upset you had to leave Green Eyes so early?”

_Really_. **_That_** was what had gotten him all riled up? He was jealous over something so _insignificant_?

A dry laugh cut through the air, Natalia holding her sides in utter disbelief. “Really, Chris? You’re jealous ‘cause some guy offered to get me a drink?”

“He’s not just _some_ fucking guy,” he argued through clenched teeth.

Natalia cringed in her seat; his Bostonian accent was heavy in his speech, evidence that he was more pissed off than she originally thought.

“Okay, fine, so he’s an ex. But did you notice me politely declining or-”

“Yeah,” he said, sharply. “I fucking noticed you flashing that sweet smile at him. _That_ -” his dark glance flicked to the right before averting back to the road, “-was fucking precious.”

“My… _what_?!” She exclaimed, wild eyes enlarging at his accusation. “You’re being ridiculous.”

“And your tits were real fucking flattered by his ogling-”

“Christopher,” the interjection came in a hard warning, “you need to stop this foolishness right this fucking second or so help me…”

But he didn’t. He couldn’t. The memory of her giggling and touching the prick’s arm like she was relishing the attention was imprinted on his brain for all eternity. The wrath he felt all over was making his insides shake and he couldn’t contain it for much longer.

_He wanted to kill the motherfucker._

“I can turn right around, if that’s what you fucking want. You can go ahead and bask in the attention you so desperately still want from him… maybe even suck his dick-”

“Wow, fuck you. You are such an asshole.”

At her spitting speech, Chris’s foot came down heavy on the accelerator, flooring it – the engine roaring in agony.

“Jesus Christ, slow the fuck down! You’re going to get us killed!” Natalia screeched beside him, holding onto the handle bars above the window while the truck bounced and joggled over a pothole.

And just like with every emotional distress that came into his life, his brain began to conjure up several insecurities that he kept locked deep inside – jealousy unlocking the hidden door and kicking it open.

“Maybe it’s best this way, I guess. You can be with someone better than me. I’m sure that’s what you really desire, isn’t it? Someone fucking normal and shit, who can give you all the things you want; who can make you happy. Who won’t fucking leave you for months at a time.”

Natalia wanted to burst into tears. This wasn’t the first time that he had tragically voiced the deep concerns of his self-worth and lack of confidence. It made her worry that he was going to flake out one day; that he didn’t hold any confidence or trust in her.

“Pull over,” she demanded, on the verge of breaking down.

Chris’s foot instantly eased up on the gas, panicked surprise etched across his tense face. “What?” He asked in a ragged breath,

Natalia shakily inhaled through her nose with her sad eyes tightly shut, desperately trying to prevent the tremors that would soon follow if she couldn’t subdue the disturbing fear of losing him. “Please, just pull over. I’m fucking done with this.”

“Nat-”

“PULL THE GODDAMN TRUCK OVER, CHRISTOPHER.”

Before the tires could roll to a complete stop on the breakdown lane, Natalia was already pushing the passenger door open and hastily jumping out. The wind slapped her across the face and it knocked the breath out of her lungs. She didn’t hear the door slamming from the other side, nor did she feel him come up behind her. All she could hear and feel were her scrambling thoughts, the blood rushing in her ears, and her heart rate spiking.

Neither the chill of the Autumn night, nor the flashing, blinding lights of the cars that sped down the highway were given a second thought. None of that mattered. Not now, not during _this_.

The anger that had been consuming Chris for majority of the night was melting the longer he stood there, looking on as Natalia started to unravel. Her breaths were coming out in short pants and her eyes were darting around, but the second her eyes landed on him, her face crumbled. She looked devastatingly _unhinged_.

All because of _him_.

Cautiously, Chris took a small step closer with his hands stuffed inside his coat pockets, ready to apologize for being a total dick. “Natalia-”

Tears brimmed her reddened eyes, a cloud of hurt filling her orbs, immediately filling him with regret. “I love you.”

“I-” His speech halted at the abrupt hand she brought up.

“ _No_. You listen to me, Christopher; just… _please_ , just fucking listen.” After a brief pause, she continued to speak when he gave the slightest nod of his head, his silent promise not to interrupt, “I _really_ fucking love you. I don’t know how much clearer I can be about that. I don’t know what else I have to fucking _do_ to make you realize that I don’t _want_ anyone else, that seeing Mark today doesn’t mean a single damn thing to me-”

“Look-”

“SHUT UP FOR A FUCKING SECOND!” She exploded for the second time. “JESUS!”

Chris’s lips met together to form a frown. He _hated_ it when she shouted at him. It made him feel small; like a child.

Natalia knew it, too – the wounded look that flashed across his face made her feel like a piece of shit, like a total bitch.

Violently shaking her head from side to side, allowing a tear to slide down her flushed cheek, she forced the sob that wanted to escape down. “I. Want. You. Do you _get_ that?” 

Her voice was quivering so bad that Chris wanted to punch himself in the face for upsetting her this much.

“I want YOU and US. I don’t care about the shit that comes with that – the name-calling from your fans, the gossip, the glares of the camera whenever we’re in LA or New York, or _wherever_ … I don’t _care_ about any of that, baby. That is going to be OUR normal. That _is_ OUR normal.” Taking a calming breath, she added, “And, yes, it _is_ fucking hard as hell when you’re not around. I miss you so much and count the days until you’re back, you know that. But, Jesus fucking Christ, Christopher, I’m _okay_ with that. You know why?”

Chris shrugged without uttering a word, just in case it was a rhetorical question.

“Because you – are – worth – it. _You_ are worth fighting for! When are you going to really GET that? I love **_you_** , baby. I want **_you_**.”

Swallowing, Chris nodded his head in understanding when she questioningly stared into his apprehensive gaze. He blinked away the sting in his eyes, then sniffled. Why couldn’t he just let his insecurities go? Why did he have to keep doing this? Why couldn’t he just let himself be happy with someone for once? He _wanted_ to be with this woman, completely unguarded, without being ridden by anxiety and forever waiting for the other shoe to drop.

He _loved_ her with his whole heart.

“I love you, too. I want us, too,” Chris finally whispered.

“ _Do_ you, though?” Natalia asked, voice cracking.

“Of course, I do. I just-” Exhaling a long, drawn out breath, Chris gave another shrug and rolled his eyes at himself. “I don’t fucking know. I’m a stupid mess.”

Natalia shuffled towards him and fisted the lapels of his coat, pulling him closer to close the gap between them. With her head upturned to stare directly into his gorgeous blue pools, her glistening eyes did all the pleading for her. “You’re not a stupid mess. You don’t have to be insecure with me…or about us…or about _anything_ , baby. We’re in this together; we work _together_. Okay?”

“I know,” Chris replied, softly, “I know.”

Pulling his hands out of his pockets, he looped his arms around her waist and ducked his head to press their foreheads together, needing to breathe the same air as her. A surge of warmth spread through his insides when her hot breath fanned his rosy cheeks and nose, a calming force found in her willingness to be near him. 

“I’m sorry for being an asshole.”

Natalia tugged on the thick fabric she kept a tight hold on. “I’m sorry for yelling at you like that.”

“I deserved it.”

A smirk played on her lips. “Yeah, a little.”

Chris’s face broke out into a lopsided grin, relieved to hear the teasing humor in her tone. Gently, he brought his cold lips to hers, feeling her smile against his own; it was a beautiful, touching kiss, albeit a little too short. “Thanks for loving me through all my crazy.”

Natalia chuckled, then whispered a short, yet meaningful, “ _Ditto_.”


End file.
